It is not there to serve you and give you things like happiness and self-esteem.
In my article on why guys suddenly lose interest, I discussed how caring too much or stressing over your relationship can irreparably damage it. When you eliminate the care (or worry or stress or whatever you want to call it), you are free to really be in the relationship. Realize stressing gets you nowhere First, you need to realize that getting all wound up over the state of your relationship serves no purpose, ever.
The article sparked an avalanche of e-mails and comments from women who were feeling panicked over the state of their relationship. You can see the other person for who he is and you can give yourself to him freely – no strategy, no game-playing, no manipulation. You can just be and there is no greater feeling than that. How do we stop our minds from spinning into overdrive, sending out waves of unpleasant thoughts and alarm bells? It causes problems within the relationship, and more importantly, it takes a huge toll on your sense of self and self-esteem.
If he doesn’t propose in the next month, then I will be upset and I will deal with it.
Until then, I’m going to enjoy the relationship and not let this bother me.
Like it will somehow lead us to a place of confidence and clarity. It will lead you in the opposite direction, rather, and cause you to feel even more uncertain and insecure.
QUIZ: Are You Accidentally Sabotaging Your Relationship? See a relationship for what it is Let’s talk about what a relationship is and isn’t. A relationship isn’t a measure of your worth or worthiness in this world.Most understood the point I was making in the article, but rather than relaxing and just going with the flow, they wanted to know: “How can I fix it if I was stressing too much? When you care too much, you inevitably become attached to a certain outcome. The next step is to get to the root of it and figure out how to solve it.The only work you have to do is to make sure you are your best self and get to a place where you can give and receive love.No amount of plotting or analyzing will change whether you and someone else are compatible. The dating process is more of a discovery process to find out if it’s there.So you enter into the relationship as your best self and then one of two things happens: it works out, or it doesn’t.