The guy who answered the question "What I'm doing with my life" by saying: "I'm just working at Staples, living life to the fullest." I was contemplating pulling down my profile entirely when Todd emailed.
I loved that movie (I saw it twice), but the film came under fire for its own narrative sleights of hand.
"That guy would never fall for that girl," a friend complained to me, and maybe he had a point, but I think we will all fall for anything if we want to believe it badly enough.
"You need to start online dating," my friend Jennifer told me. I didn't know if it was my age, or our age in general, but the whole discussion about online dating had shifted from, "Why don't you try this? Why couldn't I meet my future husband in a coffee shop, or in the produce section of a grocery store? "Well, maybe your mom can set you up with someone nice," she said. By now, most of us have tried online dating, or at least know its narrative arc: The agony of creating a personal profile (what picture should I use? ), followed by the rush of adrenaline that arrives when emails begin to pile up in your inbox.
It's such a funny mix of insecurity and power to be a woman on those sites.
Still, we are in a complicated house-of-mirrors moment with the truth.
Just ask Mike Daisey, whose tale of Apple hiring underage workers was debunked last weekend on "This American Life." It's a breathtaking hour of radio, not only because Daisey is lying, but also because he is lying to himself. It's like we're all suffering a giant crisis of authenticity.The working title for the show: "Topless Chef.'" This is the part of the story where my friends can't stop laughing. They say things like, "I can't believe you fell for this! " First of all, I never claimed to be smart, particularly not in romance.Second of all, I know diddly about Mark Cuban's HDNet, but "Topless Chef" sounds like the kind of programming that would be purchased by an eccentric billionaire who owns the Dallas Mavericks and made a city of silicone and steakhouses his adopted home. (What a convenient smoke screen, what brilliant chick-bait.) How could I be so stupid?"Isn't it strange that his profile doesn't say that he played professional soccer in Germany? I was sitting in her kitchen chair, where I often park myself as the two of us try to untangle some romantic mystery. I believed these things because -- well, because he told them to me. I believed that he was a wealthy entrepreneur who had started his first company at the age of 20.The nature of truth has always been slippery, but technology has given us so many tools for deception, and such a powerful megaphone, that we are constantly forced to defend against it. This is the herky-jerky place in which I found myself with Todd. Ours was a thoroughly 21st relationship that unfolded through the Web, email and i Phone, a drama in which the two main characters never actually shook hands.